Thursday, October 16, 2008

Breaking points

I dont really have much to say today, but as I read all my other pals blogs, I start to see a trend. Many have expressed that they have hit their breaking point. Im there. I went from being excited because today is my Friday (I now work 4 tens) and planning a "field trip" to the park with Reed and his dad to hitting a wall of exhaustion, frustration and almost tears as I got a call from my mom saying Reed was running a 102 temperature and has been lethargic all day. (He had the barfs last weekend, but I thought we were over it. )

I know that isn't a huge deal, but it seems with everything else piled on, I too am hitting my breaking point.

Add to this, a little too much election coverage, a little too much "history" in the form of some articles explaining that the steps leading up to the Nazi party in Germany very much mirror the circumstances our country is facing and the hard reality that my personal financial circumstances (which were difficult before) may become monsterous as the economy falls apart. And I cant find a logical solution. I can see the stress in my fathers eyes as he wonders "Am I always going to have to supplement Emily in raising Reed? I don't have that many more Pepsi years left in this old body...." He never says anything to me, but I can see it in his eyes. He doesn't joke about me supporting him retirement years anymore.

On the flip side, I just finished a Glenn Beck article where he talked about what we should do now. I laughed as he took basic gospel teachings (things we have been hearing for years) like planting a garden, living within our means, family night, and getting an education and presented them in a "non threatening" secular way. I love Glenn. He has been to hell and back and can sing the song of redemption. He understands the atonement. But in his article, he reminded me that in times where we hit the breaking point, those of us who are wise, return to the basics, return to what we know and are sufficiently humbled to return to our God for a renewal of strength.

After reading about Christal's nightly scriptures and prayers with her little family, I realized that I needed to be doing that with Reed. So every night we get on the "big bed" and I hand him his night time book to hold while I read a chapter from the Book of Mormon out loud. Then we have our prayers and get to read the Goodnight book Grandma and Papa Thompson gave him for his birthday. Anyway, last night we were reading about Sariah who was complaining that her boys must have died in the wilderness when they went back for the plates and didn't understand why her husband had to be a visionary man. It made me laugh. Poor Sariah. She must have been a pillar to have even made it that far....

Anyway, they finally returned and she realized her error in murmuring against God and her husbands obedience. She remembered what she had known all along... That God would provide a way to keep his commandments. She just needed to have the faith and the patience to see herself through to the end of the story (or that chapter of her story.... another one always seems to start after one ends :)

I guess what I am saying, as I am weary and I am tired and anxious about the future (and as I know so many others are...) We just need to go back to basics and take everything a step at a time. Follow the prophets, trust the Lord, and be patient. (Oh thats the hardest part for me, the hardest part....) Turn to what you know, return to the basics and remember that the Lord has an eye out for us all... Nope scratch that, the Lord has His hand stretched out TO US ALL.


Lunt Family said...

i am so glad to hear someone else is struggling. i am not meaning that in a mean way just at least I know we are human. I have had the same impression that I need to go back to the basics and let the Lord help. I know he will. Hang in there I know all will work out.

Lisa Meyer said...

Everything well said. Great reminders!