Friday, November 27, 2009

Thanksgiving thoughts

Thanksgiving is always a weird time of the year for me. I am usually sick. Which often keeps me from the usual thanksgiving binge and does not stir very thankful feelings in me.
The past few years have been more healthy (as I am not snotting myself or delirous from fever) but have been a struggle to find my thankful heart. This year was no exception. Faced with struggles and frustrations that seem insurmountable, I find myself stirring the feelings of a glass half empty. But I know there is so much to be grateful for. So here is my list of some of the things I am grateful for when I changed my perspective:

-- A son who loves me, even when I am a less than stellar mom. All my mess ups all my inadequacies melt away when he hugs me.

-- A son with a major stubborn streak. I know it makes my job harder now, but I am hoping that I can harness it and channel it and he will be "firm, steadfast and immovable" as this world spins out of control.

-- A minor health scare that reminds me that my time is limited and that I still have a lot to accomplish. The reminder that life is precious and that I need to not waste any second.

-- A home. Its not the most ideal of living situations, but I am sheltered, safe and secure. Small as it is, its full of love (and hotwheels and trains).

-- Family. They make me crazy (or at least they genetically predetermined my high chances of insanity), but I wouldn't trade them for the world. They are the reason I survive the whirlwind that seems to be my life.

-- A year of struggles that remind me that I dont have to do it all, that I dont have to do it all by myself and that both are ok. (Cause Im good enough, Im smart enough and dog-gone it, people like me! Ha ha... I swear thats what that sounded like....)

-- A job that pays the bills, a good looking resume (that will hopefully get me job I dont hate.. that pays the bills), and a desire to get more of an education and continue to better myself.

-- A sense of humor that helps me laugh when I want to cry, makes me appreciate the beauty of Will Ferrell movies and enables me to change song lyrics so I walk around like Im in my own little personalized musical. It also allows me to drive my ugly truck and not comletely fall apart from embarissment....

-- A truck, even if ugly, that gets me to work and teaches me humility.

-- Friends that always seem to know exactly when to call, text or show up, that always seem to know exactly what to say and more importantly what not to say. (THANK YOU!!!)

-- An understanding of the bigger picture. A knowledge that I am watched over by a loving God that wants the best for me, even if it includes the painful process of "becoming".

1 comment:

The Marleys said...

That sounds like a pretty good list!